God at the center of everything - Testimony

Like many boys my age in this African country, I grew up very interested in soccer, which I played with passion. A sport that almost made me leave school, if my family hadn't been so observant. As a result, I was able to complete my secondary education without any great difficulty, obtaining a baccalauréat série D (natural sciences) in 1999. I then spent two years at university in Cameroon, before leaving to study in Germany in December 2001.

I grew up in a religious Christian family environment, with a strong emphasis on Catholic rites, festivals and symbols. Once I'd arrived in Germany and detached myself from these family constraints, I became interested in many other religious, philosophical and spiritual currents. Everything was covered: African Bwiti, Buddhism, Islam, not to mention several teachings from Gnostic schools. My thirst for the mystical and spiritual was insatiable. My interest in religious dogmatism was waning. I began to question the Christian teachings I had received since childhood.

Despite this, my higher education was going well. I graduated in engineering in less than 5 years, and a few weeks later found a well-paid job in a reputable firm. With my thirst for the spiritual and mystical far from quenched, I began to experiment. I went from book to book. Any teaching that presented Man as the sole master of his destiny had a loving effect. It was obvious, I deserved the success I was experiencing, I had done everything right, I was very intelligent. To all those who saw in it some grace from God, I attached no importance. I saw some people as lazy and incapable.

I got married in 2010. Two beautiful children followed two years later. Everything was just perfect.

"Thou shalt wait seven years of marriage before singing praises to marriage". I've heard it before. I didn't believe it. And yet, there's truth in that statement. After 3 years of marriage, two beautiful children and a professional career well underway, my marriage fell apart. I don't need to go into details here. My whole edifice collapsed. I was powerless to stop the destruction of my family life, the separation of my children aged 3 and 1 1/2. The legal proceedings were ruinous. It was free fall, disillusionment.

The risk of not being able to recover financially from these heavy legal proceedings was great, not to mention the imbalance caused by the separation from my children. I was losing everything I thought I had and around which I had built my present and my future. Death, I sometimes thought, was not the worst option.

As time went by, I realized how my small successes had blinded me. I had lost sight of what was essential.

My only refuge became prayer. I turned to the Lord. As I prayed, I edified myself by reading the Bible. Stories like Joseph sold by his brothers and Job put to the test by God restored my confidence.

During this painful period, I never turned back to the mystical and philosophical teachings that had interested me in the past. More than anything else, I sought my connection to God. It's the only one that, in the face of the greatest difficulties, reassures and calms the mind.

Fear and panic disappear once we connect with God's spirit. The experience of God's presence soothes, invigorates and strengthens. Trials can sometimes be milestones along the way, reminding us of our weaknesses, our limits and our shortcomings. Let's face them by clinging to the Lord, with him making sense of everything.

After 4 years of ruinous legal proceedings, my divorce was finalized, I was able to re-establish regular contact with my children, and I regained my equilibrium in every respect.

God took control of me, I was going astray blinded by small material successes.

Everything can fall apart, but God remains God!

Now, more than ever, I put the Lord at the center of everything.

H. TSI